me: aiyoh, it's 2 years already since the last post

other me: yes ah? 2 years already meh? so fast ah?

me: ya-lah!!

OM: what happened lah, so long no post?

me: pregnant what, then gotta take care of son what..

OM: so? you surf internet what... why no blog?

me: aiyah, lazy lah want to log on lah, blogger takes forever one to log on, and then got to type type. surf internet just click click here, click click there can already what. or tap tap on the pad thingy

OM: niamah, become mother already blady lazy lah you, all also don't want to do

me: you think what? i very free izzit? no need to cook lah, clean lah, wash clothes lah. i barely got any 'me' time you know. can go crazy one you know!

OM: ceh! enough lah, don't want to talk to you already.

a lil while back a group of us got together for a much needed chill out session. we had tons of yummy food (kentucky fried chicken, potato salad, thai fried noodle, apple crumble) and loads of drinks. rudy suggested that we play 'the name game'.

rudy: come lah, play the name game

me: what's that? how to play?

rudy: you name someone, let's say for example halle berry. the next person would have to name somebody who's first name is the same letter as the last name of the previous person. ok, we use halle berry, next person would have to think of a name that starts with the letter h, and it goes on lah. if cannot name then got to drink lah. at least 2 people other than yourself has to know that person. doesn't necessary have to be movie star, as long as famous celebrity can already

hubsterman: aiyoh

me: dun want lah. sure drunk one

cammie: play lah, rudy and i always play by ourselves only

me: err... ok lah, can try

rudy: wait, wait got some more rules

me: huh? what?

rudy: wait lah, i tell you all now... it's like this. if someone names a person with just a single name like say for example madonna, then everyone has to drink. and if both the first name and the last name is of the same letter, then it reverses the rotation

me: huh? i'm so confused

rudy: you'll get it once we all play

stef: ok, let's start!

hubsterman: ok, rudy you go first, we follow clockwise. then cammie, then me, then wifey, then brian, then stef and back to rudy

rudy: henry ford (i actually forgot who he started with, but i'll use henry ford. in fact, i forgot ALL sequence, so i'll just use the names we used that night)

cammie: frank sinatra

hubsterman: so now it's s is it?

cammie: YES!

hubsterman: smokey robinson

me: r ah? ricky martin

brian: madonna

rudy: everybody DRINK! single name. it still ok now. if kena the q and the x then damn hard to think one

hubsterman: who's turn now?

me: stef's

stef: so what letter do i use?

rudy: same as before, m

stef: marilyn monroe

rudy: REVERSE. double m

brian: my turn again is it?

everyone: YES!

brian: mick jagger

me: john f kennedy

hubsterman: kobe bryant



it went on and on, all of us got drunk, especially me. then rudy wanted to add ANOTHER game on top of this one. called the rule master. one person starts to be the rule master and can make up ANY rule and the person who doesn't follow that rule will have to drink. and the rule master is also a THUMB MASTER. the thumb master will discreetly put up his thumb and once he does that, everyone else will have to put up their thumb. the last person to notice and put up the thumb will have to gulp down HALF of their drink and becomes the next rule and thumb master. oh yeah, the new rule master gets to make up another rule to add on the the previous one. gosh! so much to notice and think and do. and i'm already smashed!

rudy: ok. first rule is everyone has to rub their tummy and pat their head when they are saying the name during their turn

... then came no laughing with any sound at all, then came no calling out each other's names, then came no saying 'baby' (all of us call our men baby), then came no pointing with the finger...

was it fun? yup. could i still walk at the end of the night? barely.

created a slide show. got the idea from my sista girl's blog

Get Your Own! | View Slideshow

i do realise that i've not been posting any conversations for the past couple of months. it's just that either my conversations have been bleakh or when i've dope things to write, the internet connection is sucky. will definitely be back with more soon. that's my lil conversations with you today :-p

you know how some parents really love to BOAST big time about their children's achievements? i fucking hate that. why do that? would it reflect on them that they've raised their children well? aren't the achivements the children's own? or did they pay and pave the road of success for their kids?

here are some of the snatches of boasts that i've heard either by a thick skinned parent(s) or when i can't help but overhear (there's no need to eavesdrop, they normally talk on top of their booming voices when it comes to this part of the conversation). i've used italics at the to denote what my thoughts were in response, and in certain cases, my actual response to the speaker.



parent: my son has his own company. he's the big boss now

me: ya, ya i heard. pirated DVDs are such a lucrative business now. he must look good now, with all the weight he lost running from authorities, no more ugly like last time. sure can finally come out of the closet and find a boyfriend now

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parent: oh, did you hear? my son's gone to berkeley

me: really?? they are really helping out society nowadays. didn't know that they hired perverts as janitors

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parent: my daughter's husband is a german. his family's got loads of land in germany. they have an agricultural produce business and a large animal farm. he's incharge of the animal exports since he's been around the farm from young and has a way with the livestock

me: animals? ahh.. that explains the position i saw your daughter in the other nite when her bedroom door came ajar


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parent: my son and daughter-in-law makes loads of money just for a few days work

me: so.. how's daddy mac pimp and mama whore doin' nowadays? how are your united nation's grandchildren coming along? schooling yet?

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parent: my boy started associating pictures to words at the age of two. i used my books and magazines to start him off. he's up to more than a hundred words already

me: what are new words this week? pussy, dick, fellatio and 69?

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parent: my son's thinking of getting a new car. you know lah, businessman, must have a nicer luxury car to look presentable to this prospective clients

me: luxury car??? wah, he's taken his conning scams to a higher level i see

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parent: my daughter's famous now. travelling here and there. everytime i open any newspaper, sure to see her face

me: all these years, and she's still running drugs? when was she caught? which court did the reporters take her photo at?

this is a random conversation between me and myself. all of us talk to ourselves in our heads and sometimes even out loud. doesn't mean that we need psychiatric help but if we talk to more than one alter-ego, then...

when i talk to myself, sometimes it's the practical side talking to the emotional side, sometimes i'm scolding myself for some boo boo or other, sometimes i'm just plain trying to talk some sense into my own thick skull.

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me: Oi! those fellas doing the gutter left already ah?

other me: no sound also, sure left already. leave also never even say anything. ceh!

me: you think what, must inform you of everything ah?

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me: why those people like that photo i took? not very nice also

other me: what? cannot is it? must give reason ah?

me: no lah, that one not arty farty, so plain only. why didn't they like this one? nicer what

other me: people like you photo somemore you ask so many questions. shaddup already

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me: aiyoh, must mop the house today lah. tired lah

other me: Oi lazybum! floor sticky sticky already lah. so dirty!

me: never mind lah. mop next week. didn't get enough rest last nite

other me: excuses! last week also lazy to mop

me: ok lah. i mop after the newspapers

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me: look at her, think hell of a pretty, but look like "come fuck me" only

other me: what?! you also sometimes look like that what

me: i never look like that ok. i look hot

other me: pigi dah! hot. ceh!

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me: should i buy this book? hmmm...

other me: wait lah. paperback coming out soon one

me: yeah, but the jeffrey archer wait so long still no paperback, and now totally cannot find somemore

other me: aiyah, wait lah one more month, maybe got then

me: ok lah, ok lah. i wait

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my hubsterman is not home tonight coz he's got one of his many events going on. i decided to treat myself to a nice dinner comprising of leftovers, my 'dog rice' and a nice watercress soup. you see, my hubsterman hates watercress soup and i love it so i normally don't make it when he's home for dinner. as for the dog rice, it's when i cook corn beef with diced onions til they are almost crisp, add it to my rice and mix everything up.

my dad called up just after i put the rice to cook and asked if i wanted any food as he is going out to buy his dinner since my mom had gone out with her friends for dinner. i said, 'no thanks' and continued doing my work on my mac.

half and hour later i hear the doorbell. i started rushing to my wallet for some cash, thinking, "oh shit! it's the newspaper man, i haven't gone to the atm to take out any cash. i got no money!!" then i remembered that the newspaper man came for his collection last week.

it was my dad at the door and he brought his rice over to have a chit-chat with me while we have dinner. in other words, he wanted a date. lovely. my two best friends in the world are my husband and my dad.

i set up the table, dished up the soup, got a big bowl for my dad's packed dinner and prepared my dog rice and nuked the leftovers. we sat down to eat.

me: where's mummy?

dad: she's gone out for dinner with so-and-so

me: oh, yes ah? when did she leave?

dad: at six something. she went over to see your auntie cat. she broke her ankle

me: huh? broke her ankle? how? when?

dad: a few days back. dunno how she broke it. she's got a few screws in her leg now

me: aiyoh! that's terrible wei

dad: yup. your mother terrible. i asked her before i had my lunch if she wanted to visit her sister. she just kept quiet. then when i'm in the middle of my lunch, she hurried me to finish so that i can send her to her sister's place. when i finished my lunch and got ready, she herself still not ready to leave, dilly dallying over dunno what

me: aiyah, she's always like that one. i'm just glad she went to visit auntie cat. she treated mummy the best even though they had different mothers. the rest of her siblings from the same mother useless one

dad: yeah, she does treat your mom the best

me: yeah lah, uncle micheal is an asshole, uncle ronald is a cunning fox, auntie nic is just plain psycho

dad: well......

me: yeah what! uncle michael is an asshole. he threatened me when i was young. what kind of person threatens his ten year old niece?? moreover, he's a useless asshole. always asking for money and never returning anything he 'borrowed'

dad: yeah, me and uncle chin are always afraid of lending him anything

me: do you know that he's psycho as well?

dad: why do you say that?

me: do you remember the time when he was crazy over hinduism?

dad: yeah, i think that was the time when he mixed around with uncle walter a lot. uncle walter was always superstitious and stuff

me: no! no! i don't mean superstitious. he was psycho! i mean, i'm grateful for introducing me to those comics about hinduism. it's taught me about the hindu religion and it's deities and Gods. it's brodened my outlook on other religions. it's just that during that time, he made me and his daughter look directly into the sun and said that after a while we'll see a black dot. and that's some kind of enlightenment. who in the world tells small kids to look into the sun? eyes gone lah!

dad: not just small kids. any person of any age would spoil their eye looking into the sun

me: exactly! what the heck to i know?? i was like a few years old only. he's nuts lah. oh yeah, did you know that he's the one who taught me to flip the birdie?

dad: ha! ha! ha! really??

me: yeah, i mean what kind of uncle teaches a eight year old to show the middle finger? he didn't really tell me what it means. just that sticking out the middle finger to someone means telling a person, "you bad"

dad: HA! HA! HA!

me: no, don't laugh. did you know that i showed it to this dude while we were in auntie nic's car? auntie nic was taking me, alice and roy somewhere, and all three of us were in the backseat. and when we were at the rothman's roundabout, auntie nic probably cut into someone else's lane, you know how terrible a driver she is

dad *holding back laughter*: is that when you showed him the birdie?

me: no, no, not yet. well auntie nic probably cut into his lane and maybe he had to make another round on the roundabout and that's when he honked. how the hell do i know? i was just a kid. i thought he was just being mean, honking at us. then i faced out the back window and sneakily faced him, gave him the evil eye and stuck out my middle finger

dad: HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!

me: that fella was so shocked and angry, he barged his way to drive alongside us and gave us the middle finger. auntie nic was so confused and wondering why is the asshole in the next car giving her the finger. HA! HA! HA!